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Klepto

By Klepto
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Klepto
Klepto

It's been a while since I've done one of these.    The rules are simple; - One joke per post (anything too long I'll skip over it) - Jokes can be dark, but keep the profanity to a

Fortunatusprinz
Fortunatusprinz

LONG TIME AGO, PEOPLE WHO SACRIFICE THEIR SLEEP, THEIR FAMILY, FOOD, LAUGHTER, AND OTHER JOYS OF LIFE WERE CALLED "SAINTS" BUT NOW, THEY ARE CALLED "HACKER"

Skitzy16
Skitzy16

I'd tell u a real funny joke... But i don't think u could hack it!!

BlackKiller Newbie

BlackKiller 0

Posted
Posted
  • Hey wanna hear a dirty joke. Someone fell in the mud.                        Please choose me
  • wanna hear a clean joke. They had a shower

 

  • Monkey Student: Hey Mrs Jeff do you have any pets.
  • Teacher says in a high pitch: I have 24 pets. THEY ALL DIED .                                                               THESE ARE SIMPLE

Next day

Breaking news Mrs Jeff has murder... Does this say teachers pet? She has murdered her teacher pet. Monkey Poo?

And also 23 hamsters.... f**k life ??          And that's how the Internet is broken of memes. "MUM THE WIFI IS BROKEN! FROM MEMES!"

TheArmKing Rookie

TheArmKing 60.1k

Posted
Posted

i am so good at sleeping i can do it with my eyes closed 

Also , i never get pocket money from my parents ... 

Yesterday a thief broke in looking for money in da house so i started searching with him

 

A blonde enters a library and shouts "can i have a cheesy burger + fries please" and the librarian tells her that its a library . the she whispers " can i have a cheesy burger + fries please"

10 minutes ago, Doesthismatter said:

What is the difference between Snowman and Snowwoman?

Snowballs

straight from the internet i see xD

Bummibaer Newbie

Bummibaer 227

Posted
Posted

So, a bear walks into a pub and sits down at the bar. The bartender asks: "What'll it be, pal?" and the bear answers: "Gin..."
The bartender pours him a glas of gin when the bear says "... and tonic". Slightly confused the bartender asks: "What's with the big pause?"
The bear, putting his front legs on the bar, answers thoughtfully while looking on them: "I don't know man, my dad had them too."

GodZ69420 Rookie

GodZ69420 1.2k

Posted
Posted (edited)

[Sorry my english is bad]

Director: What is your name, my son?
Student: D-de-de-Dev-Dev-Devid, sir.
Director: Oh, are you stumble?
Student: No, sir. My dad was stumble. However, the first person to register my name was moron.

Updated by SgT.KinG
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  • Our picks

    • DC Worlds Collide v1.1.11 [+2 Cheats]

      DC Worlds Collide v1.1.11 [+2 Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in ViP Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: DC Worlds Collide By Warner Bros. Entertainment
      Bundle ID: com.wb.dc.dcwc
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/ca/app/dc-worlds-collide/id6469732370?uo=4


      Important


      Use cheat after tutorial stage 1-5

      Also game has server side power check. If your power lower than required you can't win stage.

       

      🤩 Hack Features

      - High Damage & Defense
      - No Energy Consume (Using ultimate not consume energy)
      • 29 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • DC Worlds Collide v1.1.11 [+2 Jailed Cheats]

      DC Worlds Collide v1.1.11 [+2 Jailed Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in ViP Non-Jailbroken Hacks & Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: DC Worlds Collide By Warner Bros. Entertainment
      Bundle ID: com.wb.dc.dcwc
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/ca/app/dc-worlds-collide/id6469732370?uo=4



      Important


      Use cheat after tutorial stage 1-5

      Also game has server side power check. If your power lower than required you can't win stage.

       

       

      🤩 Hack Features

      - High Damage & Defense
      - No Energy Consume (Using ultimate not consume energy)

      • 36 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • Neon Wings v20.0.3 [+4 Cheats]

      Neon Wings v20.0.3 [+4 Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Jailbreak Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Neon Wings By Voodoo
      Bundle ID: games.omicron.neonflight
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/neon-wings/id6741190842?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - Never Die
      - Unlimited Currency
      - Always Can Level Modules
      - Free Upgrades (Enable inside upgrade menu) 
      • 5 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • Neon Wings v20.0.3 [+4 Jailed Cheats]

      Neon Wings v20.0.3 [+4 Jailed Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Non-Jailbroken IPA Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Neon Wings By Voodoo
      Bundle ID: games.omicron.neonflight
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/neon-wings/id6741190842?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - Never Die
      - Unlimited Currency
      - Always Can Level Modules
      - Free Upgrades (Enable inside upgrade menu) 
      • 4 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense v20.3.3 [+4 Cheats]

      Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense v20.3.3 [+4 Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Jailbreak Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense By Sugarscone
      Bundle ID: com.nmg.townfall.ios
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/townfall-zombie-tower-defense/id6476259669?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - No Reload
      - Add Gold (Enable inside battle and finish stage)
      - Add Wood (Enable inside battle)
      - Skip Wave (Enable inside wave)
      • 15 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense v20.3.3 [+4 Jailed Cheats]

      Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense v20.3.3 [+4 Jailed Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Non-Jailbroken IPA Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Townfall: Zombie Tower Defense By Sugarscone
      Bundle ID: com.nmg.townfall.ios
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/townfall-zombie-tower-defense/id6476259669?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - No Reload
      - Add Gold (Enable inside battle and finish stage)
      - Add Wood (Enable inside battle)
      - Skip Wave (Enable inside wave)
      • 23 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • EndZone: Defend and Survive v1.0.3 [+3 Cheats]

      EndZone: Defend and Survive v1.0.3 [+3 Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Jailbreak Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: EndZone: Defend and Survive By Artemis Aura Limited
      Bundle ID: com.jiujiu.zombiedefense
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/endzone-defend-and-survive/id6742880291?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - Never Die
      - Always Can Upgrade
      - No Resource Cost
       
      • 4 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • EndZone: Defend and Survive v1.0.3 [+3 Jailed Cheats]

      EndZone: Defend and Survive v1.0.3 [+3 Jailed Cheats]

      Cashlaz posted a topic in Free Non-Jailbroken IPA Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: EndZone: Defend and Survive By Artemis Aura Limited
      Bundle ID: com.jiujiu.zombiedefense
      App Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/endzone-defend-and-survive/id6742880291?uo=4



      🤩 Hack Features

      - Never Die
      - Always Can Upgrade
      - No Resource Cost
      • 11 replies
      Cashlaz

      Picked By

      Cashlaz,
    • (Kinnikuman Extreme Japan) キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 v1.2.08 +2 Jailed Cheats

      (Kinnikuman Extreme Japan) キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 v1.2.08 +2 Jailed Cheats

      AlyssaX64  posted a topic in Free Non-Jailbroken IPA Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 By COPRO Co., Ltd.
      Bundle ID: jp.kcopro.kin001
      iTunes Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/jp/app/%E3%82%AD%E3%83%B3%E8%82%89%E3%83%9E%E3%83%B3-%E6%A5%B5-%E3%82%BF%E3%83%83%E3%82%B0%E4%B9%B1%E8%88%9E/id1623345808?uo=4


      Mod Requirements:
      - Non-Jailbroken/Jailed or Jailbroken iPhone/iPad/iPod Touch.
      - Sideloadly / Cydia Impactor or alternatives.
      - A Computer Running Windows/macOS/Linux with iTunes installed.


      Hack Features:
      - Damage Multiplier
      - Defense Multiplier


      Jailbreak required hack(s): 


      iOS Hack Download IPA Link:

      Hidden Content

      Download via the iOSGods App








      PC Installation Instructions:
      STEP 1: If necessary, uninstall the app if you have it installed on your iDevice. Some hacked IPAs will install as a duplicate app. Make sure to back it up so you don't lose your progress.
      STEP 2: Download the pre-hacked .IPA file from the link above to your computer. To download from the iOSGods App, see this tutorial topic.
      STEP 3: Download Sideloadly and install it on your PC.
      STEP 4: Open/Run Sideloadly on your computer, connect your iOS Device, and wait until your device name shows up.
      STEP 5: Once your iDevice appears, drag the modded .IPA file you downloaded and drop it inside the Sideloadly application.
      STEP 6: You will now have to enter your iTunes/Apple ID email login, press "Start" & then you will be asked to enter your password. Go ahead and enter the required information.
      STEP 7: Wait for Sideloadly to finish sideloading/installing the hacked IPA. If there are issues during installation, please read the note below.
      STEP 8: Once the installation is complete and you see the app on your Home Screen, you will need to go to Settings -> General -> Profiles/VPN & Device Management. Once there, tap on the email you entered from step 6, and then tap on 'Trust [email protected]'.
      STEP 9: Now go to your Home Screen and open the newly installed app and everything should work fine. You may need to follow further per app instructions inside the hack's popup in-game.

      NOTE: iOS/iPadOS 16 and later, you must enable Developer Mode. For free Apple Developer accounts, you will need to repeat this process every 7 days. Jailbroken iDevices can also use Sideloadly/Filza/IPA Installer to normally install the IPA with AppSync. If you have any questions or problems, read our Sideloadly FAQ section of the topic and if you don't find a solution, please post your issue down below and we'll do our best to help! If the hack does work for you, post your feedback below and help out other fellow members that are encountering issues.


      Credits:
      - AlyssaX64


      Cheat Video/Screenshots:

      N/A
      • 25 replies
      AlyssaX64

      Picked By

      AlyssaX64 ,
    • (Kinnikuman Extreme Japan)キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 v1.2.08 +2 Cheats

      (Kinnikuman Extreme Japan)キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 v1.2.08 +2 Cheats

      AlyssaX64  posted a topic in Free Jailbreak Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: キン肉マン 極・タッグ乱舞 By COPRO Co., Ltd.
      Bundle ID: jp.kcopro.kin001
      iTunes Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/jp/app/%E3%82%AD%E3%83%B3%E8%82%89%E3%83%9E%E3%83%B3-%E6%A5%B5-%E3%82%BF%E3%83%83%E3%82%B0%E4%B9%B1%E8%88%9E/id1623345808?uo=4


      Mod Requirements:
      - Jailbroken iPhone/iPad/iPod Touch.
      - iGameGod / Filza / iMazing or any other file managers for iOS.
      - Cydia Substrate, ElleKit, Substitute or libhooker depending on your jailbreak.
      - PreferenceLoader (from Cydia, Sileo or Zebra).


      Hack Features:
      - Damage Multiplier
      - Defense Multiplier


      Non-Jailbroken & No Jailbreak required hack(s): https://iosgods.com/forum/79-no-jailbreak-section/
      Modded Android APK(s): https://iosgods.com/forum/68-android-section/
      For more fun, check out the Club(s): https://iosgods.com/clubs/


      iOS Hack Download Link:

      Hidden Content

      Download Hack








      Installation Instructions:
      STEP 1: Download the .deb Cydia hack file from the link above. Use Safari/Google Chrome or other iOS browsers to download.
      STEP 2: Once the file has downloaded, tap on it and then you will be prompted on whether you want to open the deb with iGameGod or copy it to Filza.
      STEP 3: If necessary, tap on the downloaded file, and then, you will need to press 'Install' from the options on your screen.
      STEP 4: Let iGameGod/Filza finish the cheat installation. Make sure it successfully installs, otherwise see the note below.
      STEP 5: If the hack is a Mod Menu — which is usually the case nowadays — the cheat features can be toggled in-game. Some cheats have options that can be enabled from your iDevice settings.
      STEP 6: Turn on the features you want and play the game. You may need to follow further instructions inside the hack's popup in-game.

       

      NOTE: If you have any questions or problems, read our Troubleshooting topic & Frequently Asked Questions & Answers topic. If you still haven't found a solution, post your issue down below and we'll do our best to help! If the hack does work for you, please post your feedback below and help out other fellow members that are encountering issues.


      Credits:
      - AlyssaX64


      Cheat Video/Screenshots:

      N/A
      • 23 replies
      AlyssaX64

      Picked By

      AlyssaX64 ,
    • Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade v2.4.2 +5 Cheats

      Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade v2.4.2 +5 Cheats

      AlyssaX64  posted a topic in Free Jailbreak Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade By BILIBILI HK LIMITED
      Bundle ID: com.bilibilihk.jujutsuphanparaios
      iTunes Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/jujutsu-kaisen-phantom-parade/id6475925341?uo=4


      Mod Requirements:
      - Jailbroken iPhone/iPad/iPod Touch.
      - iGameGod / Filza / iMazing or any other file managers for iOS.
      - Cydia Substrate, ElleKit, Substitute or libhooker depending on your jailbreak.
      - PreferenceLoader (from Cydia, Sileo or Zebra).


      Hack Features:
      - Damage Multiplier
      - Defense Multiplier
      - Unlimited BP
      - Unlimited EN
      - Special Skills Always Active


      Non-Jailbroken & No Jailbreak required hack(s): 


      iOS Hack Download Link:

      Hidden Content

      Download Hack








      Installation Instructions:
      STEP 1: Download the .deb Cydia hack file from the link above. Use Safari/Google Chrome or other iOS browsers to download.
      STEP 2: Once the file has downloaded, tap on it and then you will be prompted on whether you want to open the deb with iGameGod or copy it to Filza.
      STEP 3: If necessary, tap on the downloaded file, and then, you will need to press 'Install' from the options on your screen.
      STEP 4: Let iGameGod/Filza finish the cheat installation. Make sure it successfully installs, otherwise see the note below.
      STEP 5: If the hack is a Mod Menu — which is usually the case nowadays — the cheat features can be toggled in-game. Some cheats have options that can be enabled from your iDevice settings.
      STEP 6: Turn on the features you want and play the game. You may need to follow further instructions inside the hack's popup in-game.

       

      NOTE: If you have any questions or problems, read our Troubleshooting topic & Frequently Asked Questions & Answers topic. If you still haven't found a solution, post your issue down below and we'll do our best to help! If the hack does work for you, please post your feedback below and help out other fellow members that are encountering issues.


      Credits:
      - AlyssaX64


      Cheat Video/Screenshots:

      N/A
      • 174 replies
      AlyssaX64

      Picked By

      AlyssaX64 ,
    • Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade v2.4.2 +5 Jailed Cheats

      Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade v2.4.2 +5 Jailed Cheats

      AlyssaX64  posted a topic in Free Non-Jailbroken IPA Cheats,

      Modded/Hacked App: Jujutsu Kaisen Phantom Parade By BILIBILI HK LIMITED
      Bundle ID: com.bilibilihk.jujutsuphanparaios
      iTunes Store Link: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/jujutsu-kaisen-phantom-parade/id6475925341?uo=4


      Mod Requirements:
      - Non-Jailbroken/Jailed or Jailbroken iPhone/iPad/iPod Touch.
      - Sideloadly / Cydia Impactor or alternatives.
      - A Computer Running Windows/macOS/Linux with iTunes installed.


      Hack Features:
      - Damage Multiplier
      - Defense Multiplier
      - Unlimited BP
      - Unlimited EN
      - Special Skills Always Active


      Jailbreak required hack(s): 


      iOS Hack Download IPA Link:

      Hidden Content

      Download via the iOSGods App








      PC Installation Instructions:
      STEP 1: If necessary, uninstall the app if you have it installed on your iDevice. Some hacked IPAs will install as a duplicate app. Make sure to back it up so you don't lose your progress.
      STEP 2: Download the pre-hacked .IPA file from the link above to your computer. To download from the iOSGods App, see this tutorial topic.
      STEP 3: Download Sideloadly and install it on your PC.
      STEP 4: Open/Run Sideloadly on your computer, connect your iOS Device, and wait until your device name shows up.
      STEP 5: Once your iDevice appears, drag the modded .IPA file you downloaded and drop it inside the Sideloadly application.
      STEP 6: You will now have to enter your iTunes/Apple ID email login, press "Start" & then you will be asked to enter your password. Go ahead and enter the required information.
      STEP 7: Wait for Sideloadly to finish sideloading/installing the hacked IPA. If there are issues during installation, please read the note below.
      STEP 8: Once the installation is complete and you see the app on your Home Screen, you will need to go to Settings -> General -> Profiles/VPN & Device Management. Once there, tap on the email you entered from step 6, and then tap on 'Trust [email protected]'.
      STEP 9: Now go to your Home Screen and open the newly installed app and everything should work fine. You may need to follow further per app instructions inside the hack's popup in-game.

      NOTE: iOS/iPadOS 16 and later, you must enable Developer Mode. For free Apple Developer accounts, you will need to repeat this process every 7 days. Jailbroken iDevices can also use Sideloadly/Filza/IPA Installer to normally install the IPA with AppSync. If you have any questions or problems, read our Sideloadly FAQ section of the topic and if you don't find a solution, please post your issue down below and we'll do our best to help! If the hack does work for you, post your feedback below and help out other fellow members that are encountering issues.


      Credits:
      - AlyssaX64


      Cheat Video/Screenshots:

      N/A
      • 385 replies
      AlyssaX64

      Picked By

      AlyssaX64 ,
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