Make Me Laugh, Win VIP. :)

[Sneezh 1.1k]

So a very pretty girl asked me in a restaurant, "Are you single?"

I enthusiastically said, "Well... yes"

She took away the extra chair in front of me. 

[fazebljfmf 10]

Li li li lick ma balls 

 

[xRenamon 72]

A joke... right... short straight and to the point... like the 6" subs Jared is eating in prison.. damn I'm hungry

[Pro 2.5k Donor]

Pro rank

[xRenamon 72]

I walked into a bar when I got outta work and asked for a drink. As I waited I eyed this super cute girl. She eyed me back, they finally hand me my drink I never took my eyes off her. I chugged the drink like a professional and licked my lips. She smiles and comes to my table. A gentleman walks inside and proceeds to the table where she was sitting. She finally gets to my table and leans on a chair in front of me saying " is this seat taken? " I said " sure, have a seat " and she smiled and takes it saying " thanks, my boyfriend just walked in " I was shocked. I asked the bartender for another beer and a guy walks up to me saying " is this seat taken? " I replied " no, go ahead and take it. The guy smiled and started feeling on my leg as he sat next to me " oh I will " he replied. 

 

Ive never ran outta a bar so fast in my life, I almost forgot to pay for my drinks

 

I wish this was a joke

Updated June 28, 2017 by xRenamon

[0xygen 396.3k]

Joke #1:

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Joke #2

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Joke #3:

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[fiaden 1.2k]

My life

[Cycas 4.2k]

Why is EA the worst gaming company in America?

Because Ubisoft is in France

[xRenamon 72]

I once asked a girl to rate me 0 out of 10. She looked at me up and down and said " your a 6 " I laughed and she said rate me 0-10. I begin looking at her up and down I begin to smile and I replied " 8 for sure " and she started laughing saying " no silly I'm bigger than that " my smile slowly fades as I said " excuse me? " she laughs and points down saying " aren't we talking about our packages? " I turned around and never spoke to him again.

[Joka 4.1k]

Joke 1:

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Joke 2:

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Joke 3:

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