Make me laugh, get 6 months of VIP

[Klepto 7.8k]

Alright kiddos. Do you have what it takes to make me laugh cause none of you seem to be funny.

You can roast me, post jokes, memes, roast DiDA especially, so yeah, do your best, or I should say worst if you're planning on roasting me.

I enjoy dark humor so try me.

This'll last for 1 week so get to it.

Up to 2 submissions per person.

 

Top 9 in no particular order:

 

1. Glohst
2. BootP
3. Mitosis13
4. DiDAs Dog
5. LoFii
6. SexyGoggwell
7. Tezaki
8. Undeadwaffles
9. Kloniax

PMs have been sent to the winners. (Only the first 5 will receive a prize)

[cu_rry 10.8k]

u suck

[Rook 567.2k Donor]

***Forum Rules Apply***

[1Jakey 952]

Bill Gates goes to purgatory.

 

St. Peter says, "Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go".

 

First, St. Peter shows Bill an image of Hell with beautiful women running on beaches. Then, St Peter shows Bill an image of Heaven with robed angels playing harps on clouds.

 

Bill chooses Hell.

 

About a week later, St. Peter checks in on Bill in Hell and finds him being whipped by demons.

 

Bill says to St. Peter, "What happened to all the beautiful women and the beaches?"

 

St. Peter replies, "That was just the screen saver."

[mitosis 4.2k]

this cracked me up

[cu_rry 10.8k]

Bill Gates goes to purgatory.

 

St. Peter says, "Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go".

 

First, St. Peter shows Bill an image of Hell with beautiful women running on beaches. Then, St Peter shows Bill an image of Heaven with robed angels playing harps on clouds.

 

Bill chooses Hell.

 

About a week later, St. Peter checks in on Bill in Hell and finds him being whipped by demons.

 

Bill says to St. Peter, "What happened to all the beautiful women and the beaches?"

 

St. Peter replies, "That was just the screen saver."

cool fact

ur picture is fake as your response

Updated February 27, 2016 by Stephen Curry

[1Jakey 952]

Jake: Will you remember me in an hour?

Camille: Yes.

Jake: Will you remember me in a day?

Camille: Yes.

Jake: Will you remember me in a week?

Camille: Yes.

Jake: Will you remember me in a month?

Camille: Yes.

Jake: Will you remember me in a year?

Camille. Yes.

Jake: Knock Knock

Camille. Who's there?

Jake: See you forgot me already!

cool fact

ur picture is fake as your response

Your picture is as real as you

[Sakswa 1.2k]

1. What's the best way to get bubblegum out of your hair?

 

Cancer.

 

 

2. Why can't orphans play baseball?

 

They don't know where home is.

[Goggwell 17.9k]

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

 

Because she had NO ARMS

 

 

Knock, knock.

 

Who's there?
 

Not Sally.

[Guest]